Remember this Sex & the City Episode?
The one where Carrie was dumped by Burger via Post-It. How insulting! It was a revolutionary
episode at the time. This was Carrie's reaction while out on a rebound date:
Carrie: You can have the guts and the courtesy to tell a woman to her face that you no longer want to
see her. Call me crazy, but I think you can make a point of ending your relationship in a manner that
does not include an email, a doorman or a missing persons report. I think you could all get over your
fear of looking like the bad guy and actually have the uncomfortable break-up conversation because
here's what avoiding that is what makes you the bad guy. And just so you know, Alan...
Andrew: Andrew.
Carrie: Uh huh. Most women aren't angry, irrational psychos. We just want an ending to a relationship
and decent and honors what we had together. So my point, Billy, is this. There is a good way to break-up
with someone that is thoughtful and it doesn't include a post-it!
Sing it sister! I felt bad for Carrie then... I kinda related to her. But now. Now I totally relate with
her!
I was put on a "break" via text from my boyfriend of six months. He'd met my friends, my family,
we'd spoken multiple times a day- everyday, I'd taken a family vacation with him and his family,
and taken a billion pictures with me. Then, he vanished. Our few day break started on 10/7. Over
a month later and I've never heard from him again.
To quote Carrie again:
"I think you could all get over your fear of looking like the bad guy and actually have the uncomfortable
break-up conversation because here's what avoiding that is what makes you the bad guy."
Seven days after that last text was M's birthday. Of course, I'd already bought his gift, and
wrapped it before the break begain. It was sitting in my front hall closet, just waiting for his birthday.
Here it still sits-
It seems like the older I get the younger these guys I date get. Standards of how to treat a person
like a person
seem to become less and less important. I wonder if all men are just regressing to cave-man form,
or if I just manage to pick all of the idiots!
I attempted my own Carrie-type rebound. After two weeks of sitting pretty knowing that waiting for
Mwas pointless I got fixed up with M #2. M #2 and I had a loooonnng awkward phone
conversation (strike 1) where we agreed to meet up at a chain restaurant. He was late. Strike 2. He
was incredibly nice though, and fairly interesting. I nicknamed him "foreclosure" in my brain shortly
after meeting him (he had good bones but needed some cosmetic work- hair and clothing mostly).
His shirt was buttoned all the way up to his neck, he was very thin which caused him to move kind of
like a lizard or the gecko in the Gieco commercials, and he had a Norman Bates way of parting his
hair. I should like him though. He was a nice guy. So, despite the lack of attraction, I was on board to
go out with him again and let attraction form. When he asked me if he could call me again I said "for
sure!"
I was on the road to recovering from my harsh text blow off, turned breakup! 30 year old M #2 waited
9 days to call me. Ugggg. Strike 3. After being blown off by M #1 it was too fresh to let M #2 into
my life when he was already doing the same thing. What is wrong with these men?
I'd better not meet another M for a very long time. I'm also very hesitant to give out my phone number
or Facebook... Even when I'm in a relationship! Maybe this way I at least stand a chance of being dumped
via post-it!
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